Prayers for Motherhood

This has been one of those weeks where the reality of motherhood makes my pre-kid romanticized vision laughable. One of those weeks where more than once I've had to say or do things I never imagine.

"Mom, can you check my bum? I have these weird bumps." 

"That's dried poop. Please don't scratch it. Head to the bathroom." 

The battle my family has waged against a nasty stomach bug has left loads of laundry, dirty floors, stinky garbage, and discarded meals, all adding to the craziness of trying to finish up my renewal process for my National Board Teaching certificate during a super intense time at school with more responsibilities than usual.

One of those weeks, where I'm reminded that the sacrifice of motherhood is one opportunity I have to practice the self-denying love of Christ. All I can do is take a deep breath and pray for mercy and strength.

The last year and a half, The Ascetic Lives of Mothers: A prayer book for Orthodox Moms has become one of my go-to prayer books, helping me put my thoughts and feelings into words to pray during times like these. Though it should be entitled "The Ascetic Lives of Women: A prayer book". It is full of encouraging scripture and stories of women of faith with themes that transcend the realm of motherhood such as anxiety, depression, financial strain, enemies, pride, forgiveness, and safety. I've adapted the prayers for situations with my siblings, co-workers, and my husband and many times through them I have found calm and focus as I poured out my heart.

When I woke up this morning, a prayer shared at a women's retreat by a favorite blogger, Molly Sabourin, came to mind and seemed fitting for Mother's Day:

O heavenly Father, make me a better parent. Teach me to understand my children, to listen patiently to what they have to say, and to answer all their questions kindly. Keep me from interrupting them or contradicting them. Make me as courteous to them as I would have them be to me. Forbid that I should ever laugh at their mistakes or resort to shame or ridicule when they displease me. May I never punish them for my own selfish satisfaction or to show my power. Let me not tempt my children to lie or steal. And guide me hour by hour that I may demonstrate by all that I say and do that honesty produces happiness. Reduce, I pray, the meanness in me. And when I'm out of sorts, help me, o Lord, to hold my tongue. May I ever be mindful that my children are children and I should not expect from them the judgement of adults. Let me not rob them of the opportunity to wait on themselves and to make decisions. Bless me with the bigness to grant them all their reasonable requests and the courage to deny them privileges I know will do them harm. Make me fair and just and kind and fit, o Lord to be loved and respected and imitated by my children. Amen. 

Be encouraged, new mother, and do not lose heart, seasoned mother, or think that the trials you are facing in your calling will disqualify you from the prize. Pray for patience, mother-to-be, for the Lord knows the desires of your heart. Pray with faith, grandmother; approach the throne room of Christ, dear godmother, for the children you have been entrusted with. Dear Women, the Lord Himself holds your hand and wants you to succeed through His love, by the power of His Cross, through the prayers of His holy Mother and all the saints. *

Lord, have mercy on us all.

*Adapted from The Ascetic Lives of Mothers

7 Weeks to 7 Years

I open up my toasty warm down, knee-length, winter jacket and draw my shivering eldest daughter inside. We are standing outside our church as part of our midnight Pascha (Easter) service.

As I do, Pascha 2008 comes flooding back, when my just-over-7-week old Magnolia slept, tucked inside my coat, while I sang the resurrection liturgy. Now, inside my coat again, my just-over-7-year old is awake and joining me in song.

The years have passed so quickly.

Art Show and Auction

Every year, Catlin Gabel has an auction fundraiser. Each class creates an art project to contribute as an auction item. There is a corresponding art show in one of our galleries to display the pieces to be auctioned along with other art created this year. 

Click to see more about Magnolia and Kaleia's pieces

Faith of Children

One of Kaleia's teachers stopped me this week as I walked across campus, with a story to tell. Kaleia's group was the last to rotate through her unit on myths. To mix things up, the teacher pulled out a book that she hadn't yet used this year.

It began, "Once, two gods were talking..." Immediately she remembered why she doesn't use this book with kindergarteners. The group erupted.

"There are gods?!" "There are two gods?!"

Kaleia confidently speaks up, excited to help her friends out, "You don't know about Him?! God has been around for a long time, before even Jesus. He made everything and still makes things and takes care of us!"

There was push back. "That's not true. My mom says we came from fish!" Kaleia patiently handles the arguing, holding to her belief, trying to help her friends understand.

Magnolia is also unashamedly sharing her growing faith. During a recent morning meeting, a Catholic classmate shared that he was celebrating Easter. Maggie chimed in that she also celebrates Easter, but on a different date--a week later this year. The class added it to the class calendar. After school, Magnolia's teacher thanked her for speaking up and sharing her faith tradition.  Her teacher also told Maggie that as a child her family had Orthodox friends and she always loved celebrating Easter twice.

Since then, her teacher emailed to share, "Magnolia has been really excited to share with us all about her traditions and activities this week, so we are thrilled to be hearing all about it. She shared with us her week in review this morning in morning meeting and the kids were really interested in hearing more each day as the week progresses!" This lenten season in particular, Magnolia is hungry to learn more about our faith. She is devoted to keeping the 40-day fast, which is nearly vegan, reading along with each new service, paying attention, and asking great questions. Her friends are getting a play-by-play and as she learns about their faiths she is comparing and contrasting. She has been particularly interested in her Jewish friends' traditions, which dovetails nicely, since Passover is so closely connected to Pascha/Easter.

As Pascha draws near and I reflect on Christ's journey to the cross, I am inspired and convicted by the innocent desire of my children to tell their world what they know, what they've found, what they believe.

To those of you that have already celebrated the Resurrection, I say "Christ is Risen!" To my Orthodox friends, I wish you a blessed Holy Week and Pascha.

For those wanting to learn more about Holy Week in the Orthodox Church, here are a couple of good resources: Holy Week: An Explanation and Pascha is the new Passover. Or, even though you've already celebrated Easter once, why not celebrate it twice? Find an English-speaking Orthodox church in your area and experience for yourself the beauty and power of the Orthodox liturgies this week. If you have any questions before or after, feel free to ask!

Curious why Pascha and Western Easter are different dates this year? Here are a few good links: Date of Pascha, The Calendar of the Orthodox Church, and Lenten and Paschal Cycle 

Pascha 09

Bleary-eyed, Shannon creeps into Magnolia's room, gently lifts her out of her crib and buckles her in her car seat, hoping she'll stay asleep, or at least sleepy. It's 4:30 am and we're on our way to our church's sunrise Paschal liturgy.

No such luck; Magnolia thinks the middle of the night is hilarious and giggles the entire half hour drive. At least she's not crying, but all parents know that manic giggling like this is usually a harbinger of crankier times to come.

Pascha (another word for Easter) is the most anticipated holiday at our church, even more so than Christmas.

The service is a huge celebration with tons of symbolism. Magnolia is very attentive. That is, until our priest shouts "Christ is Risen!!" and the whole congregration yells back "Indeed he is risen!" throwing confetti to add to the merriment. This happens several times throughout the service, and every time Magnolia starts shaking and clings to Mama or Papa for dear life. Maggie is pretty easy-going and not scared by much so we were pretty surprised. However, we did savor the snuggles.

After the service, we all enjoy a big breakfast, which breaks a 40 day (vegan-like) fast for those without health concerns, like pregnancy. Magnolia thoroughly enjoyed the strawberries.

After breakfast everybody heads home for a nap--Luckily, Magnolia gave us a 3 hour one, and avoided the anticipated crankiness!--before heading back to church for the annual church picnic. Even though the next picture makes it look like we're total loners, it is a huge party, with lots of food, games, even horseback riding.

Pascha

Pascha is the Greek word for Easter, which for our Church occured this Sunday. If you missed my previous post about why the Orthodox Church celebrates Easter on a different day than the Western Catholic and Protestant Churches, you can click here to read it now. We actually made it (only a couple minutes late) to the Sunrise Service beginning at 5am for Orthodox Easter.

The service begins in the dark reminicent of Christ in the tomb. Then the lights of the Church come on, the bells are ringing, and Father Mel shouts "Christ is Risen!" The entire congregation shouts in reply, "Indeed, he is risen!" People throw confetti and pop poppers filled with streamers. It is one of the biggest celebrations I've ever attended. All the while, our little Maggie slept on.

The Orthodox follow a strict vegan fast during Lent, the 40 days proceding Easter. So Easter morning is feast time! The youth of the church put on a big breakfast with eggs, bacon, sausage, ham, and yummy cinnamon rolls. Magnolia slept through that as well. Lucky for us, her sleeping continued long enough for Mama and Papa to get a nap before the annual Church picnic. When she did wake up she was full of smiles and things to say. We had a lot of fun at the picnic. Brian thinks the picnic is like Bilbo's birthday party at the beginning of the Lord of the Rings; lots of food!, singing, dancing, beer/wine!, kids riding horses, egg toss competition, water fights, accountants putting silly signs on their wives back, the annual silly string attack on Father Mel, and the merriment lasts all day. I snapped a bunch of pictures that you can check out on our flickr site.

What? No cute baby in an Easter dress?!

It's true. For two reasons:

1) Magnolia didn't really sleep last night, so we didn't go to church. It probably would not have been wise for either of us to drive in our sleep-deprived state. Instead we've been lounging around the house in our pajamas.

2) The church we attend is not celebrating Easter this week. Many of you probably know that Brian and I have been attending an Eastern Orthodox church for a couple of years now. The Orthodox Church follows a different calendar than the Western (Catholic and Protestant) Churches. So we will have Easter at the end of April, and at that point I will post cute pictures of Maggie in her Easter dress.

If you want to learn more about why there are two dates for Easter, check out our other blog, Liminal Incense.

For those of you that celebrated Easter today, Christ is Risen!

James and Katherine Moes

January was a busy month for Brian and me. Now that I am done working and just sitting around waiting for our baby to come, I am catching up on some blogging.

One of the highlights of January was attending our friend James's wedding. Brian went to Trinity Western University with James. They were both art majors and put on their first non-school related art show collaboratively.

Although this was the 27th wedding Brian and I have attended together(!), it was our first Orthodox wedding. Separate from our own journey, James and Katherine recently joined the Orthodox church. You can read more about Orthodox weddings on our other blog, Liminal Incense.

Congratulations James and Katherine!

May God grant you many years, health and salvation!

I love September!

For me, September represents fresh starts, new beginnings. It is the time of year I do my New Year's resolutions. There is an excitement in the air as kids prepare to go back to school. The air is crisp and the world full of color. I love how it can be rainy in the morning, but then we can have a beautiful (and warm!) evening. September in the NW is a little bit of everything.

This year my New Year's resolution is to pray before I go to school every morning. So far so good. This year is going to be filled with challenges, personally and professionally. I would like to head into each day focused on what is important.

I will be teaching two classes this year with students on nearly opposite ends of the spectrum. One class is primarily made up of students that have had little success in school, especially in math. For the most part, their life outside of school is pretty hard. The other class, Algebra 2, is primarily students that are trying to prepare for education beyond high school, since this math class is now an elective. The rest of my day is spent in a professional development role supporting teachers in our building and planning various learning opportunities for teachers. I think it will be a good year.